ARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!

Ever feel like screaming? Either at someone or the world at large? I am so angry right now. It’s not a good feeling. I don’t like being angry. I prefer to be happy and content. But sometimes people or circumstances get my blood boiling and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. And I probably shouldn’t try to stop it anyway. Suppressing feelings can lead to even worse things, like ulcers, heart problems, spending lots of money on therapy . . .

If you want to examine your anger, or its source, the library offers the following to help soothe your savage beast:

When You’re Mad at Your Partner:

Overcoming Anger in Your Relationship: How to Break the Cycle of Arguments, Put-Downs, and Stony Silences by W. Robert Nay

When You’re Mad at Your Kid:

The Self-Aware Parent: Resolving Conflict and Building a Better Bond with Your Child by Fran Walfish

When You’re Mad at Your Parents:

When Parents Hurt: Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don’t Get Along by Joshua Coleman

When You’re Mad at Yourself:

Honor Your Anger: How Transforming Your Anger Style Can Change Your Life by Beverly Engel

When You’re Mad at the World:

The Anger Trap: Free Yourself from the Frustrations that Sabotage Your Life by Les Carter

When Everyone Around You Is Mad:

Surviving in an Angry World: Finding Your Way to Personal Peace by Charles F. Stanley

—Melissa M.

‘Tis the Season

We are fast approaching one of the most emotionally difficult times of the year.  Maybe you have family you’d rather not interact with, but are forced to. Or you don’t have the family that you wish you had or used to have. Or you are more alone than you’d like to be. Any and all of these situations are difficult on an everyday basis, but become magnified during the holiday season when every store clerk, commercial, and television show tells you that you should be having a “happy holiday.”

So rather than doing yourself, or someone else, unnecessary bodily harm, why not check out one of these, and make yourself feel a bit better.

Escapist Travel Adventures
Don’t Look Behind You: A Safari Guide’s Encounters with Ravenous Lions, Stampeding Elephants, and Lovesick Rhinos
by Peter Allison

To Hellholes and Back: Bribes, Lies, and the Art of Extreme Tourism
by Chuck Thompson

Lost on Planet China: The Strange and True Story of One Man’s Attempt to Understand the World’s Most Mystifying Nation (Or How He Became Comfortable Eating Live Squid)
by J. Maarten Troost

Naked in Eden: My Adventure and Awakening in the Australian Rainforest
by Robin Easton

The Raven’s Gift: A Scientist, a Shaman, and Their Remarkable Journey Through the Siberian Wilderness
by Jon Turk

The Spice Necklace: My Adventures in Caribbean Cooking, Eating and Island Life
by Ann Vanderhoof

The Things You Find on the Appalachian Trail: A Memoir of Discovery, Endurance, and a Lazy Dog
by Kevin Runolfson

Self-Help Information
Enough!: A Buddhist Approach to Finding Release from Addictive Patterns
by Chonyi Taylor

Getting Past OK: The Self-Help Book for People Who Don’t Need Help
by Richard Brodie

Helping Me Help Myself: One Skeptic, Ten Self-Help Gurus, and a Year on the Brink of the Comfort Zone
by Beth Lisick

The Last Self-Help Book You’ll Ever Need: Repress Your Anger, Think Negatively, Be a Good Blamer, and Throttle Your Inner Child
by Paul Pearsall

Once Upon a Cow: Eliminating Excuses and Settling for Nothing But Success
by Camilo Cruz

The Three Marriages: Reimagining Work, Self and Relationship
by David Whyte

Throw Out Fifty Things: Clear the Clutter, Find Your Life
by Gail Blanke

Well Being: The Five Essential Elements
by Tom Rath & Jim Harter

My Family Sucks Too Tales
The Bill from My Father
by Bernard Cooper

Dead End Gene Pool
by Wendy Burden

Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim
by David Sedaris

I’m Down
by Mishna Wolff

Home for the Holidays (DVD)

Never Tell Our Business to Strangers
by Jennifer Mascia

Why Not Say What Happened
by Ivana Lowell

You Better Not Cry: Stories for Christmas
by Augusten Burroughs

Here’s hoping that you and yours survive the holiday season with your psyches intact!

-Melissa M.

How to be Happy While Single

Tucked away in our circulating Dewey collection is one of my very favorite old library books, Jean Van Evera’s 1949 gem of manners, etiquette, and relationship advice, How to be Happy While Single.

It’s full of information on everything from choosing an apartment to mending a broken heart, and  while some of the advice is very dated, most of it is either quite liberal (for its day) or just plain hilarious. Here are a few delightful quotes to pique your interest.

On the importance of telephones: (A man) can always go to the corner drugstore to make his calls but a girl can hardly drop in her nickel, call everyone she knows, and say: “I was wondering if you’ve been trying to reach me to take me to the Persian Room for dinner,” or, “Were you planning to invite me to the Peninsula for the weekend?” (p. 29)

On drinking: The girl who gets good and looped but rarely, will find her friends and associates tolerant, sympathetic, amused, maternal and paternal, but if she makes a practice of it, her social life will peter out. Or else she will find it is carried on in strange places with very strange people.  (p. 74)

On when to call: You don’t call a man at his office unless you have something specific, brief, and impersonal to say. Frequently he is unable to converse privately, or he may have a suspicion that his secretary has not replaced her extension phone. (p. 88)

On affairs: The idea of an affair looks good on paper, like those pension plans which pay everybody $200 a month. But sex pour le sport does not work out well for a woman. If she can get by unharmed, she is very strong-minded, very callous, or possibly, in good practice. (p. 128)

On reading: Not so long ago, as time is measured, reading was considered a useless feminine accomplishment. Even today there exists among many women the mistaken notion that merely knowing words, sentences and paragraphs means that they know how to read. (p. 145)

And remember, even though it’s hidden on the eighth stack, How to be Happy While Single is a circulating book – so request it, check it out, and enjoy!

– Amy

Bad Things, Good People, Helpful Books (and other things)

“Life is difficult.”  This simple truth is the first sentence of M. Scott Peck’s The Road Less Traveled, long considered a classic of both psychology and spiritual living. When the chips are down, and things aren’t going your way, it can be comforting to read the words of folks who have experience in these matters, whether you’re struggling with a specific situation or a general malaise. While no book is a substitute for the opinion of a qualified mental health professional, and you should definitely consider reaching out to the community, a quiet retreat with a relevant resource can help you get your thoughts together before you call on a doctor, family member, or friend.

Those seeking comfort from a higher power will find consolation from every spiritual tradition under the sun on our shelves. Those who prefer a more secular approach to problem-solving will find all sorts of hidden gems via a subject search for self-help techniques. And if you’re feeling just a tad skeptical, you might get a laugh out of Beth Lisick’s wacky misadventures with the genre.

Librarians really value your privacy, so if you’re looking for information on personal subjects, we will keep your concerns confidential when you come to the reference desk. If you really don’t feel like talking to us, though, that’s okay too – just be reassured that, no matter what you’re looking for, we try to have it in the building for you, just in case.

That will be five cents, please! Just kidding. Until next time, be safe and well.

–Leigh Anne