How I learned to fear New York City.

In Leonard Bernstein’s musical “On the Town,” the visiting sailors sing Betty Comden and Adolph Green’s lyrics, “New York, New York / It’s a helluva town.”  Well, twenty-five years ago, my movie watching would perhaps inspire one to simply sing, “New York, New York / It’s a hell…”

The Warriors (1979)
Just as I thought, New York is full of gangs including ones dressed as baseball players, ones with girls with crimped hair, and the especially scary ones wearing striped shirts and overalls who ride roller skates. 

1990: The Bronx Warriors (1982)
My mother is from the Bronx and she wouldn’t let me see this movie.  Obviously, she didn’t want me to see her childhood home taken over by various gangs including bikers, dancers, street hockey players, and more roller skaters. 

Escape from New York (1981)
In the 90s, New York City became a maximum security prison.  I mean, in this film, in the 90s, New York City became a maximum security prison.  Also in the film, cab drivers use Molotov cocktails to keep the “crazies” away.

C.H.U.D. (1984)
If you don’t know what the acronym C.H.U.D. stands for, you’ll sure be surprised when one comes up out of the sewer to attack you while you’re visiting New York.  See this movie to get the full story, though I will warn you that it’s got too much plot and not enough C.H.U.D.

I don’t know how many C.H.U.D. are in real-life NYC, but after watching all these films, I’m afraid to go there and find out.

— Tim