It Gets Better

Today is National Coming Out Day.  In honor of that fact, I want to dedicate this post to Seth Walsh, Tyler Clementi, Billy Lucas, Asher Brown, and the countless other young people who have taken their own lives, because they saw no other escape from a lifetime of discrimination, harassment, and even violence.

Of course, the victims of bullying aren’t exclusively people who are not heterosexual, who are questioning their sexuality, or who are perceived as gay.  Sladjana Vidovic was apparently bullied because she was foreign.  Phoebe Prince “was reportedly harassed by older girls who resented her dating an older football player.” Because someone circulated embarrassing photos of Hope Witsell, she was even taunted after her death.

If you or anyone you know are facing a similar situation, this post is also dedicated to you.  Please know that you’re not alone, and there are people that very much want to help you get through it.

Below are just a few of the resources available to you, at the library and beyond.  The discussion also continues over at CLPTeensburgh, where Joseph Wilk has written an amazing post that captures this issue far better than I can.  And as always, readers are invited to contribute their suggestions and experiences in the comments.

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Websites / Helplines

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
1-800-273-TALK  (1-800-273-8255)

“Are you feeling desperate, alone or hopeless? Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), a free, 24-hour hotline available to anyone in suicidal crisis or emotional distress. Your call will be routed to the nearest crisis center to you.”

Allegheny County’s re:solve crisis network
http://www.upmc.com/services/resolvecrisisnetwork/
1-888-7-YOU-CAN (1-888-796-8226)

“A crisis can be anything from feeling lonely and needing to talk – to feeling overwhelmed with life. Our lives are full of stressors both large and small, but no matter the complexity, it helps to talk with someone.”

The Trevor Project
 http://www.thetrevorproject.org/
1-866-488-7386

“The Trevor Project is the leading national organization focused on crisis and suicide prevention efforts among lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning (LGBTQ) youth.”

The It Gets Better Project
 http://www.itgetsbetterproject.com/

“ItGetsBetterProject.com is a place where young people who are gay, lesbian, bi, or trans can see with their own eyes how love and happiness can be a reality in their future.”

The Make It Better Project

http://makeitbetterproject.org/

“You have the power to change your school, community, and to influence school policies for the whole country right NOW!”

The Human Rights Campaign
www.hrc.org

“The Human Rights Campaign represents a grassroots force of over 750,000 members and supporters nationwide. As the largest national lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender civil rights organization, HRC envisions an America where LGBT people are ensured of their basic equal rights, and can be open, honest and safe at home, at work and in the community.”

PFLAG (Parents, Family & Friends of Lesbians & Gays)
www.pflag.org

This organization offers local support groups, as well as working to create change at the national level.

Southern Poverty Law Center
http://www.splcenter.org/

“The Southern Poverty Law Center is a nonprofit civil rights organization dedicated to fighting hate and bigotry and to seeking justice for the most vulnerable members of society.”

Fiction

Someday This Pain Will Be Useful To You by Peter Cameron

The Perks of Being A Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky

Nonfiction

When Life Stinks: How To Deal With Your Bad Moods, Blues, and Depression by Michel Piquemal

What You Must Think of Me: A Firsthand Account of One Teenager’s Experience With Social Anxiety Disorder by Emily Ford

What To Do When Someone You Love Is Depressed: A Practical, Compassionate, and Helpful Guide by Mitch and Susan Golant

Healing Anger by the Dalai Lama

Please Stop Laughing at Us: One Survivor’s Extraordinary Quest to Prevent School Bullying (Featuring solutions for parents, teachers, students, and adult survivors) by Jodee Blanco

The Bully, The Bullied, and The Bystander: From Preschool to High School – How Parents and Teachers Can Help Break the Cycle of Violence by Barbara Coloroso

GLBTQ: The Survival Guide for Queer and Questioning Teens by Kelly Huegel.

Hear Me Out: True Stories of Teens Educating And Confronting Homophobia, edited by Frances Rooney

Everyday Activism: A Handbook for Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual People and Their Allies (edited by Michael R. Stevenson & Jeanine C. Cogan)

-Denise

Reading Is So Gay @ CLP!

Finalists for the 22nd annual Lambda Literary Awards are poised to be announced soon, which got me thinking about all the LGBTQ fiction available from the Carnegie Library of Pittsburgh, a literary history spanning from Radclyffe Hall’s formative novel The Well of Loneliness to Alicia E. Goranson’s spirited genderqueer romp Supervillainz.

Our LGBTQ literature may be out of the closet, but that doesn’t mean it’s flying off the shelf. If your reading interests are off the path of the straight and narrow, here’s how you can get your hands on some fun, fancy, and altogether fabulous LGBTQ fiction:

The New & Featured GLBT Collection

Our Main Library boasts an outstanding collection of some of the best and brightest of LGBTQ publishing in the last few years, located on the First Floor. Every year, we reintegrate books older than a few years back into the general fiction, so if you’re browsing the stacks and see a little tan & white sticker–that’s your cue that the book was once featured in our New & Featured GLBT Collection.

Booklists on Carnegielibrary.org

Every so often, we piece together a few books from our GLBT Collection featuring different themes or just the books we’ve read and loved. You can see them all here and, while you’re at it, browse the rest of the outstanding lists that CLP librarians have put together for you.

Search the Catalog

Subject headings aren’t just for research, they work for fiction, too–especially when it comes to LGBTQ content. Our catalogers mark down the different sexualities and gender identities represented within each item’s record, allowing you to find books even when it’s not obvious. Try clicking a few of the links below:

• Lesbians — Fiction
• Gay Men — Fiction
• Bisexuals — Fiction
• Transsexuals — Fiction
• Transgender people — Fiction

No system for cataloging human sexuality and gender is ever going to be perfect (I mean, we’ve all read Michel Foucault and Kate Bornstein, right?), but hopefully through our New & Featured GLBT Collection, booklists, and behind the scenes work in the catalog, you’ll be here, queer, and reading in no time!

-Joseph

Non-fiction fix: Loads of lovely love

Today is my parents’ 38th wedding anniversary – how cool is that?  Staying with the same person for more than three decades is no mean feat, especially since the complexities of loving and being loved are among the thorniest mysteries of being alive.

Whether you’re happily married, single and satisfied, desperately seeking somebody, or all up in your companion animals, the library’s got loads of lovely love for you. Here’s sample of the helpful advice, warm fuzzies and snarky laughter waiting for you in our collection:

A Practical Handbook for the Boyfriend, Felicity Huffman and Patricia Wolff. With their tongues wedged so firmly in their cheeks they look like squirrels hoarding nuts for winter, Huffman and Wolff offer suggestions for men who want to be good boyfriends. It’s a bit like training for The A Team, apparently. Who knew? If their advice works out for you, you can move on to The Mr. and Mrs. Happy Handbook and Why Did I Marry You Anyway?.

Career Renegade, Jonathan Fields. Life is short, and you spend most of it at work. Shouldn’t you be doing something you love? See also Living Your Heart’s Desire and A Life at Work for some thoughts about crafting a career with soul and spirit.

One Big Happy Family, Rebecca Walker. It’s a complicated world, and there are as many ways to relate to a person as there are individuals to love. Walker’s collection showcases the triumphs and challenges of non-traditional family structures by giving a voice to the people who embody them.  See also Opening Up, Together Forever and Best Date Ever.

The Powerful Bond Between People and Pets, P. Elizabeth Anderson. Ever wonder why people lavish so much money and time on critters that can’t talk back (in human language)? Anderson, a clinical psychologist, examines the compelling pull of a fuzzy face on the human heart, and shows how that bond plays out in various social contexts.

Chicken Soup for the Soul: Divorce and Recovery, Jack Canfield. You may be down, but you don’t have to be out. This particular serving of Canfield’s signature soup is designed to give you the gumption to heal up, then get up and get back in the game. Those who prefer a more tough-love approach to healing might enjoy the “cover your bases” approach of The Sweet Potato Queens’ Wedding Planner and Divorce Guide.  Before you know it, you’ll be ready to take another shot at marriage (or, possibly, not).

With all due respect to my mom and dad, the thought of spending more than thirty years with the same person kind of gives me the wiggins. I’m open to the possibility that I could change my mind, especially for the right person. But for now, life seems pretty good.  I’ve got two adorable cats, one interesting gentleman caller (who, incidentally, doesn’t need the Huffman book), and a career I adore.  On top of that, the career part involves working in a 114-year-old building packed to the brim with fabulous co-workers (plus more books and materials than they’ll let me check out at any one time), and helping all of you find interesting and educational books to read.  Who could ask for anything more?

Your turn, constant reader:  who, or what, do you love?

–Leigh Anne